I've just changed the layout of this thread. The additions I made through the course of the topic were seperated by many pages which could make it all hard to follow. I've brought them all together now after the original post (as well as leaving them in their original spots). It's still worth reading through the rest if you have time because the bits I've written just represent my insights and there are many worthwhile contributions in the thread from other members.
The first time you meet with a bar girl, whether you like to acknowledge it or not, a two way vetting procedure is going on. You want to make sure that she will be good company and worth the time and money you are investing and she wants to make sure that being with you is going to be a safe and profitable (maybe even fun) pursuit.
This vetting is usually carried out without any direct conscious thought. What I am saying is that with a little thinking in advance you can save yourself a lot of trouble and expense by developing your own vetting strategy. These are things that have helped me through 21 years of mongering in Thailand.
First step in the vetting process is to make sure that you get talking to a girl that you fancy rather than one that you don't. It amazes me the number of guys who will waste time and money on a girl they don't really like just because they can't think of a polite way to get talking to a girl that they do like. One technique that I use is this; as soon as I walk into a bar or Go Go I will straight away look for a girl that I find attractive note where she is. If a girl that I don't fancy sits next to me I will immediately point to one I do like and ask "what's her name?" If you time it right the girl next to you will probably ask you if you want to talk to her and maybe even fetch her over for you without seeing it as any kind of rejection. The key to this is to ask before she has started talking to you, if you get into a conversation first she is more likely to feel rejected if you show interest in another girl.
For me the most important part of vetting a bar girl is to pay attention to the small things. If you ask somebody directly if they like you they will probably say yes whether it is true or not, just to avoid causing offense. I find it more reliable to look for clues that she likes you instead. Ask yourself "Does she really seem interested in me?" You are much more likely to have a good experience if she at least likes you a bit."Clues that she likes you might be does she look at you or away from you while you are talking? Does she lean in towards you or lean away from you? Of course bar girls could be faking these things but at least that would show that they are keen. If they like you they will usually suggest that you pay their bar fine before before you have to ask.
OK, you have both passed each others initial vetting and it has reached the bar fine stage. My advice is to get things as straight as possible in a nice way. If you want her all night you might say "I don't really like short time, I only want to take you if you can stay all night" If she says no or even hesitates then my advice is to move on, don't ignore these things just because you want her, you might regret it later if you do. Sometimes to make really sure I will ask more questions in a half-joking way "Are you sure that it isn't your friends birthday tonight?" "Are you sure that your sister isn't coming to visit you early in the morning" This shows them that you know the score and all the usual excuses that they might make to leave early. If they hesitate then just say thanks but no thanks. As regards her fee for the night; well it obviously depends on how well you know the scene. As a very loose rule, in a Pattaya Go Go expect to pay 1500 to 2500 Baht all night. In a Beer Bar 1000 to 1500 Baht all night. It depends on the establishment, the girl and how keen you are. If a girl quotes a price that you think might be too high then you could always say something like "You are a very nice girl and I do believe that many men would pay that much but I am on a budget and can only afford xxxx Baht" The important thing is to say it with a smile.
Let's not forget that his is a two way process. The girls will vet you too. I don't blame them, their lives might depend on it. There are some really messed up people out there and they have to be as sure as they can that you are not one of them. One question that they ask, which most guys fail to answer correctly (IMO) is "Don't you like English (or wherever you are from) women?" The newbies will usually blow their cover by saying something like "English women are horrible and ugly etc. Thai women are nicer and beautiful" You might believe this to be true but in my experience a bar girl will interpret this as you being a person who has issues with women in general. Not a good thing from her perspective. I have found a good answer to be "Of course I like English women, there are great women all over the world but I am in Thailand now" you can often see their faces light up when you say this. Congratulations, you have just separated yourself from the losers in her eyes.
Another question that they will use to vet you is "Which hotel do you stay at?" your answer to this question can let them know how much money you have to spend. If you are staying at a 5 star hotel then you might be able to afford to pay her more than a guy staying at a cheap Guest House. There is no advantage to being flash unless you really have so much money that you don't care. If that's the case you don't need this article and please bear in mind that you will mess things up for everybody by spoiling them.
Of course they will also vet you by your appearance and personal hygiene. No need to go over the top but at least make sure that you and your clothes are clean and that your teeth have been brushed. Another thing they will use to vet you is the way that you act around them. Bar girls have a built in radar for overly drunk or aggressive behaviour. I have often found that if I have just one too many they will see it in my eyes and lose interest straight away. I find this totally understandable.
I hope that these tips are useful to you. Of course you can invent your own vetting strategies to suit your personality. At least now you are aware that this process is going on.
I am often amazed at some of the stunts bar Girls will try on their customers. Ranging from simple cons for a few extra Baht to scenes ending in full scale violence, maybe even involving the Police. In all my years of mongering I have never had anything really dramatic happen to me personally although I have been witness to some crazy sights involving others. A lot of it is down BF'ing a "difficult" bar girl or letting her take control. The high maintenance ones are usually very attractive but will often walk all over you if you give them the chance. They are used to guys meeting all their requests and can be quite hard to handle if you haven't had much experience with them.
IMO it is probably better to get going on the right foot from the very beginning and learn to spot the ones that might be a problem before it even reaches the bar fine stage.
When you walk into a bar or Go Go you will often notice a couple of girls who are the "Stars". Cute as hell and don't they know it. Their popularity is boosted by the never ending supply of confidence that they have gained from every guy in there wanting to buy them drinks and gifts and ultimately take them home. Not surprisingly they can take their pick of the customers and will often become a bit spoiled. Personally I usually stay away from these because I don't have enough time to put up with their high maintenance attitudes. If you look around the bar you will often find some girls that are almost as cute but just as happy to blend into the background. If you prefer the quiet life then these will probably be your best bet to call over for a drink.
If you really have to have the star then here are a few thoughts to bare in mind. Make sure that start off by not giving away your power. Don't tell her how beautiful she is, everybody else does that and if you do it too you will just fade into the background (This only applies to the "Hot and know it" ones). I was once watching a load of guys ogling a cutie in a Go Go bar and it struck me how pathetic they looked. Naturally they were seated lower than her and as I watched them staring up at her with unhidden lust I though what must her perspective of the situation be? She was looking down at them both physically and probably in her mind too. The way they were acting must have made them very unattractive to her. How could she respect them while she was looking down at them as they dribbled into their drinks? A few years earlier when she live up-country and hardly ever saw any foreigners she would have stared at these same men in awe, What a turnaround! Think about how boring and predictable it must seem when guys throw the 20 Baht Ping Pong balls at them, or tell them that they are the most beautiful girl they have ever seen. They've heard it all before, many many times.
You are worthy! No matter how hot she is she is up there selling her arse to anybody with enough cash and charm (well the charm helps but isn't essential). One thing I have noticed is that many newbies will not try to meet the girls that they consider to be out of their league, looks wise. The truth is that in a bar in Thailand there aren't very many that you couldn't have, you just have to play it right. I'm not trying to encourage you to disrespect them, just to keep things in perspective. All you have to do is convey that you are cool and have some self respect. You can do this by not gushing all over her and maintaining your self control. Don't accept any bad behaviour from her. If she doesn't answer a reasonable question give her a stare that lets her know you're disappointed with her attitude. If she tries to order a Quadruple Vodka Martini with a Tequila chaser tell her she will have to settle for a standard lady drink. Another trick the high maintenance ones will try will be to try to get you to buy drinks for all of her friends. Only do this if you really want her friends around, if you don't then no need to get angry about it, a calm "no" should be enough.
This all leads to the topic of control. IME BG's will often try to gain control, if they succeed then you'd better have pretty deep pockets and a cool head because you'll be in for one hell of a ride. Their attempts to gain control will start with seemingly small request like "Can you buy my friend a Cola too?" it might then progress to her telling you that she wants to go to such and such a place before you head back to the hotel. I'm not trying to tell you to be a control freak, if you really want to do what she suggests then do it, just make sure that she hasn't slipped into the drivers seat. I can't stress how important this could be. Nearly all the problems I hear about with bar girls stem from them gaining control in one way or another. Don't be dazzled by her looks, keep your head on, enough said. Another trick they will use to try to get you towing the line will be to say something like "I'm not very beautiful" of course they think that you will reply by telling them that they are, a better answer might be something like "Everybody sees beauty in a different way" , you haven't insulted her but you haven't kissed her arse either. Some of them can be a bit self absorbed and will dwell on their problems,although many of them do have sad stories it's probably better not to dwell on such negative things, keep it light.
Be realistic. It's so easy to idealize these girls as some poor unfortunate who's being forced to sell her body and just wants to marry some guy who will take her away from it all. Sometimes that's true but just as often, especially if they are cute, they will have more than one sponsor on the go who sends her money so that she "No haf work bar" BG's can be very adaptable and your sweet innocent Thai girl could be somebody else's wild party chick. Try to hang on to your heart, at least until you know about about the place and bar girls in general.
Another problem that you might some across is BG's on drugs. I'm sure that you all have some idea what to look for, no matter how much fun they might seem to be, believe me you don't want to be around when the drugs wear off! Obviously they are much more likely to be thieves, even from other girls who work in the same bar. A lot of them are real drama queens. Things can start smashing when they don't get their way. Again, if you want the quiet life then stay away.
Once again, don't buy the Ping Pong balls! Even though she might let out a fake squeal of delight as you throw them in her direction she isn't really impressed. Please don't it's just not cool.
I hope that this has helped you to vet out the more difficult ones ones, or at least start as you wish to continue with them. If you have any thoughts or tips of you own then post away! Cheers![:LMAO1:]()
In my last piece on this thread I discussed identifying and getting off on the right foot with the harder to handle bar girls. A lot of newbies will probably end up with the same girl for multiple days, it just seems to happen that way. I'm going to put some of my thoughts forward that continue along the line of keeping control.
As a newbie you are most likely unfamiliar with the P4P bar environment. Any bar girl that you talk to will be more at home there than you. She's probably got a few friends in there and feels comfortable. If you stay in her bar she will feel very confident. This is a good thing for her but might leave you feeling a bit left out and there are potential problems. BG's are often pressurized to keep their customers in the bar, to be blunt they would rather you spent your money there than somewhere else. If you are happy in that bar then fine, but my advice is that if you feel like going somewhere else don't let the BG control the situation. Another potential problem with staying in her bar is that one of her regular or old customers might walk in looking for her. I've had it happen to me, a guy that she had been with for a month the year before walked in and it was obvious that she really wanted to be with him. I could have insisted because I had already BF'd but seriously, how much fun would she have been? I let her return the BF to me. Another potential problem with staying in her bar is that she might get distracted or sucked into a situation that occurs in there while you are there. Being a member of the staff she will feel some responsibility to stay and help out. Which is fine except that it is dictating the course of your night out for you.
If you stay with a BG for longer than a night she will probably test you to see how much she can get away with. What's she got to lose by leading you by the hand to a Gold Shop window with a hungry puppy look on her face? Some guys are so overwhelmed by being in the company of an attractive young woman that they will cave in to almost any request that she makes of them. I'm not saying don't buy them things but I would recommend that if you do then make sure that it is your idea and not theirs.
Another area where some of them will push their luck will be mobile phone use. not much worse than lying pathetically next to a BG at 3 in the morning while she talks to Gus from America! You do have to be realistic, they meet lots of men and keep in contact with some of them. if you act all jealous you will appear insecure but there are times when it is just not on and you should not hesitate to let them know. Personally, when I get back to the room with a BG I will show her that I am switching my mobile phone off, they usually get the hint and if they don't I just ask them to switch it off.
Don't get me wrong, most of them are great women, just don't forget that it is your money and your holiday.
It's amazing how the girl that you arrive back at the hotel with (let alone wake up with) can seem different to the one you thought you were taking home. of course some of it might be down to alcohol. Here are some ideas on how to make sure that she is your type before you pay the bar fine.
Your initial decision as to which BG you wish to talk to will almost certainly be based upon her looks. We all have our own preferences looks wise. Some of the girls really are expert at applying their make up so the first thing I will do when I'm making my mind up is to try to see them under different lighting conditions, either by looking at them from a different angle (good thing to do while walking to from the mens room) or waiting for the lighting to change. You might be amazed at how their appearance will change under different conditions. If they are sitting next to me I try to "look through" their make-up and imagine what they will look like after a shower or in the morning.
Of course their face is usually easy to see but not always their body. Lots of guys prefer Go Go girls because you get a much better view of their bodies from the word go. Even in Go Go clubs though you can still end up disappointed, look out for the girls that don't show their stomachs or walk around in jeans as if they have already been bar fined, quite often they will be the one who have already had children and are likely to have stretch marks. Wonder-bras have a lot to answer for, making normally endowed girls seem like page 3 material. Sometimes though that girl in the jeans will have the body of a goddess under her clothes. the thing that will affect the appearance of her body more than any other factor is of course whether or not she has had children. Personally I do prefer girls who haven't had children yet.
It can seem a bit cold just asking a girl if she's had children or not straight up so I usually mix it in with other getting to know you type questions. I might ask if she had a Thai boyfriend before she started work and then if she says yes I will ask how many children she has had. If she answers in the affirmative I will ask her how old they are and if she has any photos of her child(ren) to soften the intent behind the question a bit (I know, I'm a big softy). If she says no I will just quickly start talking about something else as if the answer wasn't important.
If only there was a sure fire way of working out in advance which ones will be great in bed. Actually even "great in bed" is subjective with some people liking a porn star performance and others preferring something more sensual. if you like the porn star types then look for signs of outward confidence like tattoos, body piercings etc. Will she kiss you passionately in the bar? One thing I have noticed though is that larger than life behaviour in the bar doesn't always equal larger than life in the sack. the surest measure of performance is probably how she feels about you. look for signs that she's really into you, things like does she listen to you intently or is she easily distracted. Does she look into your eyes or avert your gaze? Some girls are great at groping you and talking dirty just to get you to pay the BF so I prefer to trust these more subtle signs. If there's something that it is really important for you to know that the girl will do then by all means ask her. The easiest way is to make it into a little joke, or at least give a sly smile while you ask.
One last tip, sometimes mamasans will ask if you want a lady to talk to? the best bet is probably to tell her that you will let her know when you see a girl that you like because it can be a bit embarrassing saying that you don't like the girl that she chooses for you.
If anybody else has any more techniques for finding out if she's your type then please post your ideas here. If you liked this post then you might enjoy 'The Newbies Guide To Getting Involved With Bar Girls' which explains the risks of a newbie getting emotionally involved with bar girls.
VETTING BAR GIRLS (AND HOW TO PASS THEIR OWN VETTING)
The first time you meet with a bar girl, whether you like to acknowledge it or not, a two way vetting procedure is going on. You want to make sure that she will be good company and worth the time and money you are investing and she wants to make sure that being with you is going to be a safe and profitable (maybe even fun) pursuit.
This vetting is usually carried out without any direct conscious thought. What I am saying is that with a little thinking in advance you can save yourself a lot of trouble and expense by developing your own vetting strategy. These are things that have helped me through 21 years of mongering in Thailand.
First step in the vetting process is to make sure that you get talking to a girl that you fancy rather than one that you don't. It amazes me the number of guys who will waste time and money on a girl they don't really like just because they can't think of a polite way to get talking to a girl that they do like. One technique that I use is this; as soon as I walk into a bar or Go Go I will straight away look for a girl that I find attractive note where she is. If a girl that I don't fancy sits next to me I will immediately point to one I do like and ask "what's her name?" If you time it right the girl next to you will probably ask you if you want to talk to her and maybe even fetch her over for you without seeing it as any kind of rejection. The key to this is to ask before she has started talking to you, if you get into a conversation first she is more likely to feel rejected if you show interest in another girl.
For me the most important part of vetting a bar girl is to pay attention to the small things. If you ask somebody directly if they like you they will probably say yes whether it is true or not, just to avoid causing offense. I find it more reliable to look for clues that she likes you instead. Ask yourself "Does she really seem interested in me?" You are much more likely to have a good experience if she at least likes you a bit."Clues that she likes you might be does she look at you or away from you while you are talking? Does she lean in towards you or lean away from you? Of course bar girls could be faking these things but at least that would show that they are keen. If they like you they will usually suggest that you pay their bar fine before before you have to ask.
OK, you have both passed each others initial vetting and it has reached the bar fine stage. My advice is to get things as straight as possible in a nice way. If you want her all night you might say "I don't really like short time, I only want to take you if you can stay all night" If she says no or even hesitates then my advice is to move on, don't ignore these things just because you want her, you might regret it later if you do. Sometimes to make really sure I will ask more questions in a half-joking way "Are you sure that it isn't your friends birthday tonight?" "Are you sure that your sister isn't coming to visit you early in the morning" This shows them that you know the score and all the usual excuses that they might make to leave early. If they hesitate then just say thanks but no thanks. As regards her fee for the night; well it obviously depends on how well you know the scene. As a very loose rule, in a Pattaya Go Go expect to pay 1500 to 2500 Baht all night. In a Beer Bar 1000 to 1500 Baht all night. It depends on the establishment, the girl and how keen you are. If a girl quotes a price that you think might be too high then you could always say something like "You are a very nice girl and I do believe that many men would pay that much but I am on a budget and can only afford xxxx Baht" The important thing is to say it with a smile.
Let's not forget that his is a two way process. The girls will vet you too. I don't blame them, their lives might depend on it. There are some really messed up people out there and they have to be as sure as they can that you are not one of them. One question that they ask, which most guys fail to answer correctly (IMO) is "Don't you like English (or wherever you are from) women?" The newbies will usually blow their cover by saying something like "English women are horrible and ugly etc. Thai women are nicer and beautiful" You might believe this to be true but in my experience a bar girl will interpret this as you being a person who has issues with women in general. Not a good thing from her perspective. I have found a good answer to be "Of course I like English women, there are great women all over the world but I am in Thailand now" you can often see their faces light up when you say this. Congratulations, you have just separated yourself from the losers in her eyes.
Another question that they will use to vet you is "Which hotel do you stay at?" your answer to this question can let them know how much money you have to spend. If you are staying at a 5 star hotel then you might be able to afford to pay her more than a guy staying at a cheap Guest House. There is no advantage to being flash unless you really have so much money that you don't care. If that's the case you don't need this article and please bear in mind that you will mess things up for everybody by spoiling them.
Of course they will also vet you by your appearance and personal hygiene. No need to go over the top but at least make sure that you and your clothes are clean and that your teeth have been brushed. Another thing they will use to vet you is the way that you act around them. Bar girls have a built in radar for overly drunk or aggressive behaviour. I have often found that if I have just one too many they will see it in my eyes and lose interest straight away. I find this totally understandable.
I hope that these tips are useful to you. Of course you can invent your own vetting strategies to suit your personality. At least now you are aware that this process is going on.
MORE TIPS FOR VETTING BAR GIRLS (Spotting and keeping control of the more difficult ones)
I am often amazed at some of the stunts bar Girls will try on their customers. Ranging from simple cons for a few extra Baht to scenes ending in full scale violence, maybe even involving the Police. In all my years of mongering I have never had anything really dramatic happen to me personally although I have been witness to some crazy sights involving others. A lot of it is down BF'ing a "difficult" bar girl or letting her take control. The high maintenance ones are usually very attractive but will often walk all over you if you give them the chance. They are used to guys meeting all their requests and can be quite hard to handle if you haven't had much experience with them.
IMO it is probably better to get going on the right foot from the very beginning and learn to spot the ones that might be a problem before it even reaches the bar fine stage.
When you walk into a bar or Go Go you will often notice a couple of girls who are the "Stars". Cute as hell and don't they know it. Their popularity is boosted by the never ending supply of confidence that they have gained from every guy in there wanting to buy them drinks and gifts and ultimately take them home. Not surprisingly they can take their pick of the customers and will often become a bit spoiled. Personally I usually stay away from these because I don't have enough time to put up with their high maintenance attitudes. If you look around the bar you will often find some girls that are almost as cute but just as happy to blend into the background. If you prefer the quiet life then these will probably be your best bet to call over for a drink.
If you really have to have the star then here are a few thoughts to bare in mind. Make sure that start off by not giving away your power. Don't tell her how beautiful she is, everybody else does that and if you do it too you will just fade into the background (This only applies to the "Hot and know it" ones). I was once watching a load of guys ogling a cutie in a Go Go bar and it struck me how pathetic they looked. Naturally they were seated lower than her and as I watched them staring up at her with unhidden lust I though what must her perspective of the situation be? She was looking down at them both physically and probably in her mind too. The way they were acting must have made them very unattractive to her. How could she respect them while she was looking down at them as they dribbled into their drinks? A few years earlier when she live up-country and hardly ever saw any foreigners she would have stared at these same men in awe, What a turnaround! Think about how boring and predictable it must seem when guys throw the 20 Baht Ping Pong balls at them, or tell them that they are the most beautiful girl they have ever seen. They've heard it all before, many many times.
You are worthy! No matter how hot she is she is up there selling her arse to anybody with enough cash and charm (well the charm helps but isn't essential). One thing I have noticed is that many newbies will not try to meet the girls that they consider to be out of their league, looks wise. The truth is that in a bar in Thailand there aren't very many that you couldn't have, you just have to play it right. I'm not trying to encourage you to disrespect them, just to keep things in perspective. All you have to do is convey that you are cool and have some self respect. You can do this by not gushing all over her and maintaining your self control. Don't accept any bad behaviour from her. If she doesn't answer a reasonable question give her a stare that lets her know you're disappointed with her attitude. If she tries to order a Quadruple Vodka Martini with a Tequila chaser tell her she will have to settle for a standard lady drink. Another trick the high maintenance ones will try will be to try to get you to buy drinks for all of her friends. Only do this if you really want her friends around, if you don't then no need to get angry about it, a calm "no" should be enough.
This all leads to the topic of control. IME BG's will often try to gain control, if they succeed then you'd better have pretty deep pockets and a cool head because you'll be in for one hell of a ride. Their attempts to gain control will start with seemingly small request like "Can you buy my friend a Cola too?" it might then progress to her telling you that she wants to go to such and such a place before you head back to the hotel. I'm not trying to tell you to be a control freak, if you really want to do what she suggests then do it, just make sure that she hasn't slipped into the drivers seat. I can't stress how important this could be. Nearly all the problems I hear about with bar girls stem from them gaining control in one way or another. Don't be dazzled by her looks, keep your head on, enough said. Another trick they will use to try to get you towing the line will be to say something like "I'm not very beautiful" of course they think that you will reply by telling them that they are, a better answer might be something like "Everybody sees beauty in a different way" , you haven't insulted her but you haven't kissed her arse either. Some of them can be a bit self absorbed and will dwell on their problems,although many of them do have sad stories it's probably better not to dwell on such negative things, keep it light.
Be realistic. It's so easy to idealize these girls as some poor unfortunate who's being forced to sell her body and just wants to marry some guy who will take her away from it all. Sometimes that's true but just as often, especially if they are cute, they will have more than one sponsor on the go who sends her money so that she "No haf work bar" BG's can be very adaptable and your sweet innocent Thai girl could be somebody else's wild party chick. Try to hang on to your heart, at least until you know about about the place and bar girls in general.
Another problem that you might some across is BG's on drugs. I'm sure that you all have some idea what to look for, no matter how much fun they might seem to be, believe me you don't want to be around when the drugs wear off! Obviously they are much more likely to be thieves, even from other girls who work in the same bar. A lot of them are real drama queens. Things can start smashing when they don't get their way. Again, if you want the quiet life then stay away.
Once again, don't buy the Ping Pong balls! Even though she might let out a fake squeal of delight as you throw them in her direction she isn't really impressed. Please don't it's just not cool.
I hope that this has helped you to vet out the more difficult ones ones, or at least start as you wish to continue with them. If you have any thoughts or tips of you own then post away! Cheers
MORE THOUGHTS ABOUT COMMON MISTAKES AND PROBLEM PREVENTION
In my last piece on this thread I discussed identifying and getting off on the right foot with the harder to handle bar girls. A lot of newbies will probably end up with the same girl for multiple days, it just seems to happen that way. I'm going to put some of my thoughts forward that continue along the line of keeping control.
As a newbie you are most likely unfamiliar with the P4P bar environment. Any bar girl that you talk to will be more at home there than you. She's probably got a few friends in there and feels comfortable. If you stay in her bar she will feel very confident. This is a good thing for her but might leave you feeling a bit left out and there are potential problems. BG's are often pressurized to keep their customers in the bar, to be blunt they would rather you spent your money there than somewhere else. If you are happy in that bar then fine, but my advice is that if you feel like going somewhere else don't let the BG control the situation. Another potential problem with staying in her bar is that one of her regular or old customers might walk in looking for her. I've had it happen to me, a guy that she had been with for a month the year before walked in and it was obvious that she really wanted to be with him. I could have insisted because I had already BF'd but seriously, how much fun would she have been? I let her return the BF to me. Another potential problem with staying in her bar is that she might get distracted or sucked into a situation that occurs in there while you are there. Being a member of the staff she will feel some responsibility to stay and help out. Which is fine except that it is dictating the course of your night out for you.
If you stay with a BG for longer than a night she will probably test you to see how much she can get away with. What's she got to lose by leading you by the hand to a Gold Shop window with a hungry puppy look on her face? Some guys are so overwhelmed by being in the company of an attractive young woman that they will cave in to almost any request that she makes of them. I'm not saying don't buy them things but I would recommend that if you do then make sure that it is your idea and not theirs.
Another area where some of them will push their luck will be mobile phone use. not much worse than lying pathetically next to a BG at 3 in the morning while she talks to Gus from America! You do have to be realistic, they meet lots of men and keep in contact with some of them. if you act all jealous you will appear insecure but there are times when it is just not on and you should not hesitate to let them know. Personally, when I get back to the room with a BG I will show her that I am switching my mobile phone off, they usually get the hint and if they don't I just ask them to switch it off.
Don't get me wrong, most of them are great women, just don't forget that it is your money and your holiday.
IS SHE YOUR TYPE?
It's amazing how the girl that you arrive back at the hotel with (let alone wake up with) can seem different to the one you thought you were taking home. of course some of it might be down to alcohol. Here are some ideas on how to make sure that she is your type before you pay the bar fine.
Your initial decision as to which BG you wish to talk to will almost certainly be based upon her looks. We all have our own preferences looks wise. Some of the girls really are expert at applying their make up so the first thing I will do when I'm making my mind up is to try to see them under different lighting conditions, either by looking at them from a different angle (good thing to do while walking to from the mens room) or waiting for the lighting to change. You might be amazed at how their appearance will change under different conditions. If they are sitting next to me I try to "look through" their make-up and imagine what they will look like after a shower or in the morning.
Of course their face is usually easy to see but not always their body. Lots of guys prefer Go Go girls because you get a much better view of their bodies from the word go. Even in Go Go clubs though you can still end up disappointed, look out for the girls that don't show their stomachs or walk around in jeans as if they have already been bar fined, quite often they will be the one who have already had children and are likely to have stretch marks. Wonder-bras have a lot to answer for, making normally endowed girls seem like page 3 material. Sometimes though that girl in the jeans will have the body of a goddess under her clothes. the thing that will affect the appearance of her body more than any other factor is of course whether or not she has had children. Personally I do prefer girls who haven't had children yet.
It can seem a bit cold just asking a girl if she's had children or not straight up so I usually mix it in with other getting to know you type questions. I might ask if she had a Thai boyfriend before she started work and then if she says yes I will ask how many children she has had. If she answers in the affirmative I will ask her how old they are and if she has any photos of her child(ren) to soften the intent behind the question a bit (I know, I'm a big softy). If she says no I will just quickly start talking about something else as if the answer wasn't important.
If only there was a sure fire way of working out in advance which ones will be great in bed. Actually even "great in bed" is subjective with some people liking a porn star performance and others preferring something more sensual. if you like the porn star types then look for signs of outward confidence like tattoos, body piercings etc. Will she kiss you passionately in the bar? One thing I have noticed though is that larger than life behaviour in the bar doesn't always equal larger than life in the sack. the surest measure of performance is probably how she feels about you. look for signs that she's really into you, things like does she listen to you intently or is she easily distracted. Does she look into your eyes or avert your gaze? Some girls are great at groping you and talking dirty just to get you to pay the BF so I prefer to trust these more subtle signs. If there's something that it is really important for you to know that the girl will do then by all means ask her. The easiest way is to make it into a little joke, or at least give a sly smile while you ask.
One last tip, sometimes mamasans will ask if you want a lady to talk to? the best bet is probably to tell her that you will let her know when you see a girl that you like because it can be a bit embarrassing saying that you don't like the girl that she chooses for you.
If anybody else has any more techniques for finding out if she's your type then please post your ideas here. If you liked this post then you might enjoy 'The Newbies Guide To Getting Involved With Bar Girls' which explains the risks of a newbie getting emotionally involved with bar girls.